I used to think, quite arrogantly in fact, that I was doing all the things I did at church because if I didn't who else would? At the time of course I didn't see it as arrogance but really it is. Who did I think I was? God doesn't need me to keep His church open. He doesn't need me to lead worship, or sing solos, or preach, or ANYTHING. He doesn't need me. He wants me but He doesn't need me. God's Word has existed way before I got here. The message of His love has existed for centuries, generations and it has spread and saved millions way before I was even a thought. And it will continue on once I'm gone.
But I NEED God. I need the Holy Spirit. I need the saving grace of my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. I need the presence of the Lord like I need air. He didn't need me to sing solos but I needed to sing the Word of the Lord for myself. To remind me of His goodness, His love; to be met by God and experience God on this deeper level. It's not until I was no longer doing those things that I realized how much I needed them, not how much they needed me.
I want to be used of God. Why? Not to be praised and recognized but because it gives me the opportunity to experience and grow closer to the great God I serve. Whatever God has called you or I too we get more out of it than we think we do. We get the opportunity to step into our destiny, to live the God ordained life, the perfect life for us. Didn't James say, "Count it ALL joy"? (James 1:2-3)
I know what it feels like to walk in the path God has set for me and then to not walk in that way. Not walking in the path God has set sucks! Things are not as sweet. Lights are not as bright. Joy is slightly dim. I find I am happiest when I am totally and completely enveloped in the love, presence and will of God. When I call out to Jesus and I hear Him whisper to me, I'm here peace like no other surrounds me.
Being a Christian isn't sexy and glamorous. It isn't easy or a cakewalk either. We don't all have a bunch of money and flash or homes or tons of food, clothes or anything else this world equates with prosperity. God doesn't always show up in grand gestures and fireworks. But He does show up. And He does show out. And He gives us what we NEED. And He always has our back. And He always meets you where you are. And He loves you desperately.
Even as I type this, with tears in my eyes, God is ministering to my heart just as I pray that whoever reads this will be touched as well. If you don't know Jesus as your Savior and Lord I urge you to accept Him today. The Bible says that if you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and that you believe it in your heart you are saved right then and there. Say, "Lord I accept you as my Lord and Savior. I believe Jesus died for my sins and that He is coming back again. Come into my heart. In Jesus name, Amen.
That's it. It will not seem like it but you will no longer be the same on the inside. You will now have a permanent friend who will be with you always. There might not be a party on earth when you do so but there is most certainly one in heaven as God writes your name in the book of life.
God doesn't need you. But He WANTS you. And, at least for me, we desperately need Him, even though we may not think so or even want Him.
The Unlikely Missionary
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