Faithful One

The life of a Christian is not, I repeat, is NOT an easy one. Choosing Christ is not an easy choice. Living of the world is easy because that is how our nature is inclined.

In my devotional time today I was reminded of this fact. That we as Christians are to be partakers of Christ's suffering. Jesus' life was not an easy one. His choice to die was not an easy one. So why do we assume that our lives, if we truly want to live a life according to the will of our Heavenly Father, will be easy? We suffer not because God hates us but so that thru our test we will be able to lead someone else thru theirs. How could Jesus comfort the sick if He had never been Himself? How could He sympathize with poor if He had never been poor Himself? How could He understand sorrow if He had never wept a single tear?

All God asks of us as we walk this narrow road is to be faithful because He promises to be faithful to us, to the end. I have watched members of my church suffer cancer, illness, death, financial hardship and yet and still they have been faithful to God. Thru it all they have remained faithful to God. It is easy to bail when things aren't going the way we thought they would or hoped they would. That's what the world says to do. If my church family and my dad had that mentality we would no longer exist as a church. But its not about success the way this world measures it. Its about how God measures success. If we stay faithful to the One who set us on the course in the first place we may never see the fruits of our labor while we are alive but the Kingdom WILL be furthered by your faithfulness and trust in the authority and wisdom of the Alminghty.

Even as I type this the Lord is ministering to my heart. He's asking are you ready for me to take you places you never thought you'd go? Are you ready to cast aside all the plans you have created to take my plan for you and own it and see it thru to fulfillment? Are you ready for the tests, the struggles, the pain, the sorrow that I promise will make you better, stronger, more Christlike?

Let's be clear here, DON'T go looking for suffering. And don't think that good things don't happen to the people of God. God takes care of His people, make no mistake. But when suffering seems to come knocking at your door what are you gonna do with it? Are you gonna let it defeat you or are you gonna run to the arms of your Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ and ask Him to undergird you with the strength to make it thru.

Remember that God will ALWAYS be faithful to you. He is the Faithful One. He promises to never leave nor forsake. He has a plan for you, to prosper you and to give you a future and a hope. Do you trust Him to work out whatever it is? It isn't easy but Jesus was faithful and now He sits at the right hand of the Father in heaven. That's pretty incredible just for sticking it out thru tough times. Our reward will be far more amazing then anything this world can offer if we put our faith and trust in the Most High God.

Its not easy but its WORTH IT.

Faithful to the Work

There are times when we begin to question the things that we do and the calls God places on our lives. We get into a routine. We go to work or to school, we play sports or hit the gym, we're involved in our communities, we are dedicated to our ministries; all things that are great. But I found myself recently asking the Lord,

"God, is this what you want me to be doing? I feel like I'm doing all these things and none of them well. I feel like I'm failing. I know you have called me to ministry and you have placed me at this place in my life but is this what you want?"

I was really discouraged and on the verge of tears. I was frustrated but more hurtful to me was I felt that I was letting my Savior down. I told a friend of mine what was on my heart and the advice they gave really blessed my heart.

All we need is a little bit of faith and God will do the rest.

We don't have to be dynamic people or extraordinary. We just have to be faithful to God. In my devotional time this week I read "Individual Discouragement and Personal Growth" in My Utmost for His Highest. It gave the example of the Lord calling Moses to be the savior for the people of Israel while they were enslaved in Egypt. Moses heart at first was on fire to bring justice to his people as seen in Exodus 2:11-12. But right after this he flees Egypt and lives in the desert for 40 years. He gets discouraged and when God finally comes to him to tell him to deliver his people Moses gave God the side-eye. Lol.

When we throw ourselves into our work we think we know all the answers and that we can make it work on our own. Moses' time in the wilderness taught him, "Who am I Lord?" He realized he couldn't do it by himself. He realized that he needed God. He needed to be in stride with God. We become so dependent on ourselves and when things don't go right we question God.

God was telling me I've called you here, trust me to complete the work in you and thru you. Faith is easy in theory but difficult in practice. This is when God grows you. When your forced to trust Him.

Moses may have given God the side-eye but he still trusted Him and did the work. When we begin to question our call or when God first calls us we have to examine ourselves. Say yes Lord, throw away your self-righteousness, clothe yourself in oneness with the Savior and then be faithful to the work.

All That Matters To Me

All that matters me is what you see when

You look at me
All that matters to me is how you feel when
You think of me
No more distractions my one affection
Is only you my Jesus now….
You’re all that matters*

When I was younger I worried so much about what others thought. All of my worth was bound up in other peoples opinions. My self-esteem and self-worth hit rock bottom when I was 19 and I couldn't take it anymore, I wanted it all to end. During that time of total and utter self-hate the Lord showed me that my worth is found in His eyes. When you look into the Father's eyes all you is love shining down at you. No matter what you do or what you look like to God you are beautiful. Worth dying for.

We will always be tempted to measure ourselves against the world but your worth isn't measured in worldly measurements because we can't measure pricelessness. Only God can.

All that matters to me is who and what He sees when He looks at me and that should be all that matters to you too. 

* Lyrics by Anthony Evans, Undisguised 2009

The Power of Prayer

Matthew 7:7-11
 

⁷"Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. ⁸For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened.  ⁹"Which of you, if his son asks for bread, will give him a stone? ¹⁰Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake? ¹¹If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him! 

Over the last few months I have seen the Lord move in a mighty way all because of one simple thing, I asked Him to. The Lord wants us to ask. His Word says ask and it will be given, seek and you will find, knock and God will open the door and invite you in. I'm NOT talking about facetious prayers; I'm talking about asking for the Lord to rain down His blessings, asking the Lord to shower you with His grace and mercy. Petitioning Him for strength when you feel totally used up and can't seem to take another step. Asking Him to take residence in your heart and transform you from the inside out. Saying Lord use me for your honor and glory. Going to Him for forgiveness. Thanking Him for being Creator of the universe and for His continued faithfulness even when we have been unfaithful.

God is an Almighty God who thinks it not robbery to listen to our prayers. My God wants us to come to Him. He loves when we pour out our heart to Him. The last couple of weeks I have been worked to the bone and I was (still am) exhausted. I would get up in the morning tired and I went to bed the same. But everyday as I spent time in prayer God would give me the strength to get through my day and He reminded me of those little things, like breathing, walking, seeing, that we take for granted. If He saw fit to wake me up every morning could He not get me through the day? Could He not work in my situation? Could He not renew and transform me? Could He not make everything alright even though I couldn't see how? Absolutely!

When we ask God to carry us through He is good to His Word. If we don't give our own a stone when they ask for bread why would our Lord and Savior, lover of our souls, and Redeemer of all creation give us any less then what we ask for? In fact he gives us more!

Talk to God once in a while and see how the power of praying to the Living God changes your life.   

Be Love

In the midst of the fear, sadness, and uncertainty that blanketed New York this day 9 years ago so did love.

I am an eternal New Yorker. Born and raised... I plan to raise my family here. This attack hurt my heart and paralyzed me. All eyes were on us, but not because of Fashion Week or because the President was in town or because the Pope was visiting, but because we were hurting. We New Yorkers have an slight arrogance about us. Our city suffered a great blow and it was a tough pill to shallow. We grieved. Together.

People helped each other. Color and all those other prejudices didn't matter. This was our city. We were all hurting and we all needed each other. When cops and firefighters ran into those towers they didn't say hmmmm, I can't help you, you don't look right, they just went in to save people.

I often wonder that if we treat everyone with love, not suspicion or hate or prejudice what our world would look like? If we were kind to others would they ever feel the need to hurt others?

I saw the love and kindness and spirit of people that day and in the days that followed. I feel like we didn't let hate win when we held candlelight vigils, and held hands and prayed. We said then, you tried to break us but it only brought us together.

Don't know if I can still confidently say that all these years later.

Love kills all of the things that hate tries to foster. Isn't that what Jesus did? His love destroys our sins, if we let Him. His love for us kept Him on the cross. He taught that love was the most important things and its one of the things we give the least.

Today as we remember the sacrifice of those who gave their lives and the love that was poured out on my city, what are you doing to show love to someone? Don't say you want hate to stop. Be the agent to stop hate but being love. Don't talk about it, be about it. It can be something as small as a smile and a Good Morning but it could change someones life.

That Name

Just finished listening to this song and it just filled my spirit with the beauty and glory of the Most High God. This has been a tough week for me but God is so good. He is worthy of my praise even when it seems that what you want is so far out of reach. But when you remember that just the Name of Jesus makes things happen you realize that you need to stop worrying and just praise Him. Now I'll just let Ms. Yolanda sing and you not just listen but fully understand the power of Jesus name.

There is a name that is so precious,
a name so wonderful to me.
This name is worthy of all praises.
Because of him, I am made free.
That name is Jesus, oh, how I love him.
The one who gave, his life for me.
Because of love, so unconditional,
I will have life, eternally.

This name speaks peace, unto my storm clouds,
This name speaks calm, unto my fears.
And when I feel, that no one loves me.
His loving presence is so near.
That name is Jesus, oh, how I love him.
The one who gave, his life for me.
Because of love, so unconditional,
I will have life, eternally.

Praise that name!
Praise that name!
Praise that name!
Praise that name!

Someday I'll leave this earthly dwelling,
Through time and space, my soul will soar.
And I will finally see the face of Jesus.
and I'll praise that name, forevermore!
That name is Jesus, oh how I love him!
the one who gave his life for me!
Because of love so unconditional
I will have life eternally

Ohhh Matchless is that name!
Oh glorious is that name!
Wonderful is that name
Just praise....That name

His Promise

"I am with you and will watch over you wherever you go, and I will bring you back to this land. I will not leave you until I have done what I have promised you." - Genesis 28:15

Don't you love how people promise you things and never deliver on their promises? 

Yeah I didn't think so. 

My grandfather always said your word and your name is all you have and once you go back on your word your reputation is destroyed. 

Didn't Dru Hill sing, "I never make a promise that I can't keep, that ain't me"? That's what God says in His Word, I never make a promise that  I can't keep, that ain't me. Over and over, time and again God has made promises that He never renegs on. His Word is His bond. When you hear His name you know it is trustworthy. Ask anyone that He has made a promise to and they'll tell you, "He's good people."

Hey, I'm one of them. God promised to never leave me nor forsake me and He's still with me going strong after almost 18 years. Even some of the most trustworthy people you know will go back on their word but God's Word has survived wars, burnings, famine, murder, governments and still stands firm even as people try (but don't succeed) to discredit it. 

No matter what, if God gives you His Word its DONE. No ifs, ands, or buts about it.

I'll leave you with the lyrics of this song by Avalon cuz You can take Him at His Word.

I can take You at Your word
And my heart can rest assured
Lord, I love You
Oh, I trust You
As I live I've learned
I can take You at Your word

Your Worth

The minute YOU put a price on yourself you underestimate your worth. We are creatures that are prone to self-doubt and feelings of unworthiness. We beat ourselves down and up and sideways everyday because we don't think we're good enough. We settle for less than the best because we don't think we deserve it. We let foolishness dictate how we see ourselves. We buy into the lies.

A guy that I was seeing once gave me some great advice,

Know your worth!

But what is that? How do you measure that?

If you measure it by the world's standards you will always sell yourself short. Because we feel we will never measure up to the "ideals" of this place we call our earthly home.

But if you measure your worth by God's standards you will understand that you are, "fearfully and wonderfully made!" (Psalm 139:14) When you understand that the price God paid was a life for a life; when you truly grasp that God gave His precious and blameless son Jesus up to the cross so that we would know how much we are loved you will most assuredly know that you are PRICELESS. In the kingdom when you finally get how much God loves you a whole host of angels have a celebration in your honor. Legions in fact. That's pretty deep to me. (We must be important huh?)

Jesus paid it all. And His life is worth more than all the precious gems and cash anyone in this world could ever attain or imagine. It is worth more than all the riches possessed in this whole world.

That life was destroy because you were more important to God. He chose us! That's what your worth and you can take that to the bank.

The Resume of Jesus Christ

I found this in my Facebook inbox this morning. I think this is great.

THE RESUME OF JESUS CHRIST
Address: Ephesians 1:20
Phone: Romans 10:13
Website: The Bible. Keywords: Christ, Lord, Savior, and Jesus

Hello my name is Jesus Christ. – The Christ. Many call me Lord! I’ve sent you my resume because I’m seeking the top management position in your heart. Please consider my accomplishments as set forth in my resume.

Qualifications

• I founded the earth and established the heavens, (See Proverbs 3:19)
• I formed man from the dust of the ground, (See Genesis 2:7)
• I breathed into man the breath of life, (See Genesis 2:7)
• I redeemed man from the curse of the law, (See Galatians 3:13)
• The blessings of the Abrahamic Covenant comes upon your life through me, (See Galatians 3:14)

Occupational Background

• I’ve only had one employer, (See Luke 2:49)
• I’ve never been tardy, absent, disobedient, slothful, or disrespectful
• My employer has nothing but rave reviews for me, (See Matthew 3:15-17)

Skills Work Experience

• Some of my skills and work experience include: empowering the poor to be poor no more, healing the brokenhearted, setting the captives free, healing the sick, restoring sight to the blind and setting at liberty them that are bruised, (See Luke 4:18)
• I am Wonderful Counselor, (See Isaiah 9:6). People who listen to me shall dwell safely and shall not fear evil, (See Proverbs 1:33)
• Most Importantly, I have the authority, ability and power to cleanse you of yours sins, (See I John 1:7-9)

Educational Background

• I encompass the entire breadth and length of knowledge, wisdom, and understanding, (See Proverbs 2:6)
• In me are hid all of the treasures of wisdom and knowledge, (See Colossians 2:3) 
•  My Word is so powerful; it has been described as being a lamp unto your feet and a light unto your path, (See Psalms 119:105) 
•  I even tell you all the secrets of your heart, (See Psalms 44:21)

Major Accomplishments

• I was an active participant in the greatest Summit Meeting of all times, (See Genesis 1:26)
• I laid down my life so that you may live, (See II Corinthians 5:15)
• I defeated the archenemy of God and mankind and made a show of them openly, (See Colossians 2:15)
• I’ve miraculously fed the poor, healed the sick, and raised the dead!
• There are many more major accomplishments, too many to mention here. You can read them on my website, which is located at: www dot – the BIBLE. You don’t need an Internet connection or computer to access my website.

References

• Believers and followers worldwide will testify to my divine healing, salvation, deliverance, miracles, restoration, and supernatural guidance.

In Summation
Now that you’ve read my resume, I’m confident that I’m the only candidate uniquely qualified to fill this vital position in your heart. In summation, I will properly direct your paths, (See Proverbs 3:5-6), and lead you into everlasting life, (See John 6:47). When can I start? Time is of the essence, (See Hebrews 3:15).

He Loves Us!

The song How He Loves Us by the David Crowder band has been singing in my heart for the last week. When I think about my God and all He gave up for us, I know how much He loves me.

So many things try to strip us of the love of Jesus. Those circumstances and those obstacle and those people may change but God is NEVER changing. His love is deeper than the ocean, his thoughts toward us are more numerous than the grains of sand on every beach in all the world (Psalm 139).

He doesn't owe us anything but He gives us everything if we are willing to receive His gift.

If you doubt He exists just pause for a minute and try to understand how your breathing and your not telling yourself to. How is the earth spinning and your not feeling it. How your eyes see and your ears hear and your small feet and ankles are able to hold you up without you falling down. Look outside at the trees. Think of the thousands of species of animals that cover this earth all with names. All designed in their own unique way. There is no way its an accident or that it came from a bang.

It came from a God who loves us beyond our own conscious thoughts and wildest imaginings.

Sing it out with me:

He loves us,
Oh! how He loves us,
Oh! how He loves us,
Oh! how He loves.

I Am NOT Ashamed

"I am not ashamed of the Gospel
The Gospel of Jesus Christ
I am not afraid to be counted
But I'm willing to give my life
See I'm ready to be all He wants me to be
Give up the wrong for the right
I am not ashamed of the Gospel

of Jesus Christ"

I couldn't always say that I wasn't ashamed. Not of the gospel that my faith is based on but I was ashamed to say I was a Christian because of all those who proclaim to follow Christ and are perpetrating a fraud. Who are quick to call one a sinner forgetting they are one themselves. Who say they are loving and then will talk about you behind your back. The ones who hoop and holla on Sunday and will curse you out on Monday. Those who cause people to judge you and say, "Oh, you're a Christian".

People that even I couldn't stand. People I didn't want to call my brother or sister.

Being authentic whether Christian or not is what is the most important thing but in today's society they tell you to be fake. Put on airs, be this person, buy that thing to be a better you. How about we all be who God created us to be?

I am no longer ashamed to be a follower of Christ. I'm no longer afraid to make that known to people. I'm not flashy, I'm not in your face and I don't need to be. I just need to be me. God's love for me shines through me.  I may not be "Christian" enough for some and I may be to "Christian" for others but I'm not trying to appease everybody. I don't need everyone's stamp of approval.

I want God to look at me when I stand before Him and have Him tell me, "Well done my good and faithful servant." That is my goal, to let the light of Jesus Christ shine through me.

I used to sing this song out at the top of my lungs when I was a little girl and it would always move me to tears but I never truly grasped what it meant til I got older. 

I am not ashamed...

Because He wasn't ashamed to leave His throne to die for me.

Slow Down

You don't realize how fast paced your life is until you are forced to slow down.  Friday I found out that I sprained my ankle. So I have to wear a soft cast for two weeks and this ugly boot thing (at least its black so I can work with this fashion-wise). What I realized about myself over the last couple of days is that I walk incredibly fast and that I am always on the move. For some reason I am always in a rush and I don't really like to sit for extended periods of time. But now that I am forced to slow down I appreciate my feet all the more and I sympathize with those who have problems with their feet.

It is a bit (ok, A LOT!) frustrating because I can feel how much slower I am going and I find that when I've been standing/walking for awhile I need to find a seat quick and something to put my foot up on . But today as I was walking (slowly, lol) to my office I really got to see the beauty of the world that God created for us. I could feel the cool breeze on my skin, the sunshine on my face, I could smell and see the beautiful flowers and trees. Things I would ordinarily miss because I would be whizzing by. My mind racing as fast as my feet on all the things I would be trying to cram into my day.

In our lives how often are we breezing through it, whizzing passed those things God wants to show us and more often then not running right passed God because there are things more important than Him. We get so caught up in the things we feel are "necessary and important" we miss the things that truly are just that.

Thru this injury that at first seemed more like an annoyance than anything else, God today reminded me to just slow down and take in all that my life is and will be. Don't breeze thru it, enjoy it. Things will happen when they are supposed to. Don't be in a rush to get there. Enjoy the journey and trust the process.

Slow Down.

Adjust Your Mirror

I like how we say we love ourselves then we snip and tuck and poke and pinch and nip and sow and glue and suck and inject everything and the kitchen sink onto or into or out of ourselves to make us a better us. But how do we measure better? When we measure ourselves against what the world deems beautiful or acceptable we will always fall short.

I know I definitely do. My hair isn't always done, my outfits aren't always fly. I'm skinny but I can't say that my body looks like Naomi Campbell's or Eva Pigford's. My skin ain't flawless, my thighs jiggle and sometimes I thoroughly enjoy just being bummy and not caring a lick.

I was always unhappy with the way I looked cuz I never measured up until...

I looked at myself through a new lens. Through the lens of  my Creator. I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Created loving and planned for by the same man who fashioned the stars and carved out the oceans. I am important and I matter because I am important and matter to God.

So I ain't nip, tucking, squeezing nothing. Lol. So wat some things I'd rather didn't jiggle, jiggle. God made me who I am and if when He looks at me He gives a stamp of approval then it is all GOOD.

But the LORD said to Samuel, "Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The LORD does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart."

1 Samuel 16:7

I am more content with who I am now then I ever was when I was younger because I know who I belong to. Yeah I still have days where I look at myself and twist up my face, lol, but... (cue organist)

when I think about Jesus and what He's done for me, when I about Jesus and how he set me free... 

I wouldn't trade me for anything because He gave up everything just so that I could have life. Thats how special I am. Thats how special we all are. 

So adjust your mirror.

Its Hard Waiting

This Christ walk I'm on ain't easy. I have doubts. Not about who God is to me and what He has done for me. But about the process. Sometimes I struggle with the waiting. God promises to take care of you and lead you in down the right path. But He doesn't reveal things right away. Sometimes He shows you ahead of time but more often then not He doesn't.

I am one that struggles with patience. I have very little of it. Its a terrible thing. Its one of the fruits of the spirit that I have yet to master.

Waiting on the Lord is hard because we are people who live in a world of instant gratification. We want it and we want it now. God doesn't work that way. If He places a desire within you He will grant you that thing but in His perfect timing.

I know that He knows when I'm ready for things and that everything happens for a reason but its INCREDIBLY hard. Knowing that God will do it and then trusting He will are two different skill sets.

But I'm trying. *sigh* All I know is that when God does bless me with what I'm waiting for I will appreciate it and cherish it all the more because I waited on Him for it.

Set Free

Crazy concept when I say I serve someone huh?

Romans 6:18 (The Message)
Offer yourselves to sin, for instance, and it's your last free act. But offer yourselves to the ways of God and the freedom never quits. All your lives you've let sin tell you what to do. But thank God you've started listening to a new master, one whose commands set you free to live openly in his freedom!

So many people say they are free. Hmmmmm. So where did addiction come from? We all say we can stop at anytime. If we could we wouldn't need rehab for drugs, sex, overeating, alcohol, gambling, shopping, smoking, etc. You name it they have rehab for it. We have patches and gums and shots and Pavlov tricks to help us try to break our addictions (sounds like being enslaved to me).

But I don't do those things....

How many times a day do you check your facebook page or twitter? What would you do if one day you left your cellphone home by accident? I bet you would go back home (or at least would want to) to get it. Don't you just have to see your favorite show on TV?

What's crazy is often times we don't realize the hold things have over us. We get used to being controlled by them.

Am I guilty of going back for my phone and checking facebook a little too often? Yep. I won't lie. But I've also turned my phone off for days at a time and not been on facebook for weeks sometimes.

I decided to serve a different master when I was a little girl and it has made a HUGE difference in the decisions I have made. Sometimes I've gotten off track but I always know because suddenly it will feel like the walls are starting to close in around me. And then I say, Lord show me what to do. And He leads me out to fresh air and open space.


Freedom. Can you smell it?

We are taught that being a child of God is restrictive and you can't do what you want. I wanna have sex. Ok, along with that comes STDs, babies, AIDs, broken hearts, and shattered lives. Doesn't really sound like freedom to me. I wanna drink and party. Ok, I can see DUIs, waking up next to strangers, hangovers, and blackouts in your future. Doesn't sound like freedom to me.

I'm not judging. I just want to open your eyes to another choice. Another reality.

You may see consulting Christ on decisions as tedious and time consuming and cramping your style but..

It could save you heartache and pain.

Hey, but what do I know.

Romans 6:22-23 (The Message)
But now that you've found you don't have to listen to sin tell you what to do, and have discovered the delight of listening to God telling you, what a surprise! A whole, healed, put-together life right now, with more and more of life on the way! Work hard for sin your whole life and your pension is death. But God's gift is real life, eternal life, delivered by Jesus, our Master. 

I invite you to accept God's gift. He might surprise you.

Whom I Serve

Its funny how many different versions of Jesus people have. He's black, he's white. How silly that is because he was Jewish. They say He was rich but His cradle was an animal's feeding trough. My Savior was a poor carpenter who depended on the kindness of others for food and shelter. He was a person that most people would ignore if they passed Him on the street. He wouldn't be given a second thought.

All the things that we think savior's should be He was not. He wasn't regal or rich and powerful in society. But He was definitely whom we needed. He cared about the poor because he was. He was willing to touch the untouchable because He knew that at the end of His life we would treat Him like a leper. His heart broke over the death of a friend. He knew what it was to go hungry, to sleep outside, to have friends and family turn their back on Him. He knew what it meant to feel physical pain.

And when it was all said and done He endured torture and crucifixion because He couldn't bear the thought of us living in hopelessness and suffering.

My Savior is my best friend. He has washed away my tears, hugged me when my heart was broken, looked me in the eye and let me know that everything will be alright. He has taken me back every time I strayed, sought me out when I ran away, loves me unconditionally, and forgives me all my mistakes to never bring them up again. Never has He led me wrong or let me down.

He is the only reason I get up in the morning, the only true reason for my joy, the only person who knows my heart and my thoughts.  The only person who has never hurt me, shown me malice or ill will even when I have severely wronged Him. He's the only reason I still believe in people.

True it would be "easier" to go with the flow of the world. But if I did I would be dead. Literally. (I'll explain a little about that later) I would be depressed, without hope, and alone. All the things Jesus wanted to prevent when He died and rose again. I don't care what happens to me because I trust Him. I'll count it all joy because he gets it and understands it all.

And serving Him has set me free.

Best decision I ever made to follow a poor Jewish carpenter who was beaten and killed so that I wouldn't have to live my life without His love.

I'm Not Who You Think

I started this blog almost 5 months ago. It was birthed out of my experience at Urbana. Urbana is a christian missions conference that took place in St. Louis, MO. While there I felt God calling me to missions but not the way you might think. I am not missionary like AT ALL.

I like running water. I'm not a fan of roughing it. I can't STAND bugs or wild life. As I like to say, Nature is not my friend. And I don't really have a desire to travel. When you think missionary you think of someone who goes to Africa or Haiti or India or some other hurting country. To know me you know that just ain't me.

God isn't the type to put you in a situation where He knows you will fail. Then I realized, there are hurting people in my neighborhood. There are scared uncertain people on my block. I pass them everyday on the street. My mission field isn't some country 30 hrs away its right in my backyard.

Then I had a Moses moment. I said to the Lord, "Who am I?" (Exodus 3:11) And He said, "I am who I am. 'I AM has sent you.' "

So here I am. The Unlikely Missionary.

I've got my faults, I'm not perfect, I mess up, fall down, get turned around and all of that. But I serve a wonderful, loving perfect God who always welcomes me back when I do something stupid.

So the journey begins today. It took me five months to get it together but at least I didn't take as long as Moses to get my act together. Lol.